Part 6: Breaking up is Hard to Do

April 5, 2010 in Conversations in Public,discourse,writing

image via http://thefbomb.org

image via http://www.thefbomb.org

Remember back in the day when we needed to get over someone, we could totally try to pretend that the other person no longer existed?

With the exception of bumping into that person in the street, or at social events thrown by friends left neutral post-split, there was virtually no mental residue of needing to know that person’s current affairs.

Enter the era of social networks, blogs, and status updates – where it’s all out there for the world to see. The ultimate blow of having the magical ability to follow said person’s self-elected dirty-laundry.

I say “this person” because, well, as it pertains to my life specifically this person is not what society would necessarily deem to be an “Ex”. He’s a person who was (circumstantially) important to me, and simply needent be any longer.

I choose to think it’s as simple as that (Stage 1: Denial).

At that point in our whatever-it-was, the wires of communication had become totally tangled. I needed to get over it but there he was online and everywhere.

In an effort to distance myself – and do some detangling – I blocked him on IM (ow). I un-followed him on Twitter (double ow!). I removed him from my feed on Facebook (no one needs to know). I haven’t actually de-friended him on Facebook. After consulting friends about FB rules, everyone considered the maneuver – although strategic – to be pretty harsh.

Did it help?

Well, sorta. Obviously the curiousity takes time to fade. And old habits die hard. I think what happens is, in time, the other person wonders where you went and they reach out to you. And that’s probably the kind of person you’d want to be with in the first place – and so the universe somehow righted itself.